I Fall Apart - Rory Gallagher's "A Million Miles Away" was the first track I ever heard from the hard nose blues guitarist. I remember, in my early years of learning the drums, I'd play along to "A Million Miles Away" pounding out the repetitive beats for its seven minutes. I was good enough then to get by because although it sounded good to me with my headphones on, it probably sounded pretty mediocre to those in ear shot.
While my first Gallagher song stuck with me for some time, I never expanded out into his catalog. One day that changed, either with a CD from the trusty library, or the influence from someone else, I'm not quite sure. What I do know is that the first time I got my hands on Rory Gallagher's self-titled debut album I fell in love with "I Fall Apart." The third track on the album begins as so many of my own song ideas begin. Slow, subtle, and aesthetically pleasing to the ears. It has mystique, elegance, and a darkness that encapsulates the meaning of the song. It can simultaneously be a dark track about love and yearning while painting a musical landscape shrouded with clouds as the sun peaks it's head out from behind. There is hope but there is sadness. It makes me feel connected to the story's narrator and to the musicians playing the music. They are feeling the changes, the emotions, and the drive of love when they play those notes. That is why I love music and writing so much. In both of their respects, music and the written word allow a person is convey their feelings and emotions into art that influences and touches others.
"I Fall Apart" brings the listener on a rollercoaster ride, soft and steady at first and ending with a wild car chase speeding down the highway towards all those emotions you sent away. The music is catching up and it makes my heartbeat quicker. Passion is the fuel behind the track and it finds me running along with it every time.
Self - I'm thankful for social media on days when I get to see my friends. Friends from a far, friends doing great things, friends expressing themselves in such beautiful ways. My attention is focused on them, but that line of admiration gets skewed and my eyesight drawn away from those I love and care about to strangers I never knew existed. The bane of the social media world is the worm hole we all get sucked down at one time or another. The only other shining light through the dark gloomy storm that is our culture - the little details that slip through the crack. The ones that grab you with a strong hold in split seconds.
Cleo Sol's "Self" was that ray of sunshine that grabbed me from the first bass note I heard. Within the hundreds of reels I watched that specific day there was only one that struck me immediately. I don't even remember what the visual aspect was nor do I care. What I got out of it was a new friend, a new admiration, and a new discovery. "Self" found the mood I had been putting myself in and made it okay to acknowledge it. I haven't even given in to the lyrics because I don't know what they are saying. The vocal cadence and pitch of Cleo's expression catch me at the right angle. She could be singing about anything in the world and I would listen. The musical structure and vibe are all I need to get hooked. But now that I've honed in on what exactly she is saying I'm happy to include this track for one more reason.
Sahara Cowboy - The obligatory instrumental track award goes yet again to Arc De Soleil in this week's playlist with the effortless performance of "Sahara Cowboy." I want to be a cowboy and I want to listen to this music while I ride on my horse through the land, breathing in fresh air, and clearing my head.
I found the next piece of the puzzle here and it fits to perfect amidst the other tracks that warm my soul. In a quick realization, I've had an idea that these might be my distraction's. These tracks, full of warmth, ease, and dreams are the ones that allow me to drift away, far away from my problems, to a place where I see friends, loved ones, and all the good times we've had. It even plays movies of those good times to come. They are up their manifesting into dreams big as our eyes could see.
Everything and I mean everything about this track is perfect. Like an artist filled with too much time, too much doubt, the addition of anything to this song would in fact render it worse. No more constant changes, what ifs, inclusions. Arc De Soleil created a masterpiece, amongst all the rest of his triumphs, that takes me away to a fabulous place.
She Brings The Rain - To be honest, the last four tracks of this week's playlist were a struggle to find and compile. In a dash to finish the track list, I searched for song's that spoke to me this week. These last four are songs I care about, song's that make me feel and frequent multiple moods and occurrences throughout my days.
"She Brings The Rain" sits in between two moods yet it doesn't distinguish which one it's learning towards when I'm feeling either side heavier than the other. I take this CAN track out for a stroll when I'm down, when I'm sad and I'm feeling melancholy (with a slightly more upbeat mood.)
The song is driven by the bass and the bass hits me hardest when it's as deep as it can go. When it's able to penetrate my mind and emotions. It's not the upbeat bass of funk or rock it’s a slow walk of pondering and wearing your heart on your sleeve. The subject matter sits well with the other happenings in my mind where relationships are questioned and feelings aren't sure of themselves. The journey through this track and the journey through loving that specific someone is the same. The clouds always seem to dissipate and bring around the feeling of hope, but ultimately in the end she always brings the rain.
Hurdy Gurdy Man - The opening track to my all time favorite movie, "Hurdy Gurdy Man" creates the eeriest setting of any song I have ever heard. How can such a song full of sentiments of "love" turn itself into a cryptic offering of something so dark? It could be my own association of it with a movie about such devilish behavior. It could also deal with my own skewing of the sounds and tones with darker imagery and the way my mind and soul perceive these noises and translate them into feelings.
Zodiac opens with the harrowing depiction of the July 4, 1969 killing of serial killer's two victims backed by Donovan's "Hurdy Gurdy Man." I can most times listen to this track without replaying that scene in my head, but there is always the connotation and heavy weight of the events of that early July night fifty plus years ago that come rushing back to me when those eerie notes tickle my ears. I love it for so many reasons, both creepy and not, but coupled with my fascination with the Zodiac killer and the essence of the late 60's and early 70's makes for one jam packed association with one piece of music.
I'm curious to see how this track impacts others. Those who have seen Zodiac or not and those who have never heard this song. Is that aura of creepiness still there or is it portrayed by something else?
"Wild Motion" sounds like what it would feel like to be in a movie. An opening scene fading in from black, slow motion, moving in over city scape or in on someone walking down the street. It's a scene with focus on a story so strong you're pulled to it because of the feeling all around. It sets the tone by calming you down, intriguing you, while getting you alert and ready for what's next to come.
The combination of the soft instrumentation with warm vocals makes me feel safe and at home. While "Hurdy Gurdy Man" excites me in the realm of anticipation and wonder, "Wild Motion" captures the essence of a slow-motion montage and pastes it right onto my heart. I can't help but be at ease and relax my muscles when I hear this track. It makes me want to grab my lady spin her around and dance by the fire as we enjoy our evening in. I'm filled with happiness and love and with the sandwiching of this week's playlist, that lone feeling of love is what makes it easier to keep going.
Trying To Live My Life Without You - I've been letting music dictate my moods lately as I've been struggling with purpose and how to feel about my life as a whole. Most times I decide to avoid my problems, stroll on through the day doing physical tasks or distracting myself with social media. Other days I pace around searching for something to do - anything. Those days are the hardest because my mind will race and think about all those things I'm not too fond of, all the things I wish I did differently, could do differently.
"Trying To Live My Life Without You" was a product of the shuffle game as I, ashamedly so, searched for an ender to this playlist. I couldn't round out this week's group of songs because I wasn't really into it. I have been putting myself in certain mindsets and states of sadness that have not allowed me the luxury of finding new and exciting music. So, when the sounds of Otis Clay's hit came on, I gravitated towards those feelings of loneliness and trapped them. It helped that I enjoyed this song just as much as I saw it as an end to a means so to speak.
I wouldn't say I have ever given in to any of the vices sung about on this track, but I do find that I have my own coping mechanisms in different realms. Music is one of them and I use it almost every day to distract myself or to immerse myself in the deepest of feelings. Sometimes I look at my life and congratulate me for not getting into such wild behaviors or self-deprecating hobbies, but in a deeper look I see that I live a "normal" life full of underwhelming effort, excuses, and distractions. I may not be doing drugs and throwing my money away, but I'm slowly withering further and further away from the person I want to be. I can't wallow in sadness for the rest of my life, can I? I hope not.
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